Exponential Power

Wow.  It has been a crazy long time since I last blogged.  I didn't have Internet or a real computer in Puerto Rico.  Did you know, it doesn't allow you to write a blog from an iPhone? I've really missed this; I love writing. I think it is fitting that I start my blog back up with this days post.  These 3 areas of my life have changed drastically in the last several months.

All I can say is: Life is full of potential. It didn't feel that way a few months ago.  In fact, I felt quite the opposite a few months ago.  I was depressed and wanting to hide my head under a pillow any time I wasn't helping take care of my aunt with dementia.  I was jobless, nearly broke (still am), my marriage was on shaky ground, and I felt completely alone in the world.  I was pretty much back to where I was when I first started my journey towards health and wellness (in all areas of my life).  Crying in a ball on my bedroom floor: hopeless and lost. Thank God for God and my family and my husband.

Health: So I moved back in with my parents earlier this year to help take care of my aunt that has developed dementia.  She's young and she can't get aid until there is a firm diagnosis.  So no one in the family really had the time to take care of her like she needed.  I was able to step up and step in. In that time, I became highly sedentary.  I mostly sat around watching tv with her.  That, in addition to my mom's very good and very high fat/highly processed/highly sweet cooking, I put on 20 pounds in a short period of time.  I tried to get more active, but I was still feeling depressed about the my life.  Vicious cycle of feeling blue, eating junk food to feel better, and wanting to sleep all the time only led to my weight gain and feeling more blue.  In 21 days I was able to change that all around.  I started eating clean, portion correct sizes (us Mid-Westerners really like to load up a plate) and working out for just 30 minutes a day.  BAM! I lost about 7.5 pounds and a total of 8 inches.  1.75 inches from my waist.  So excited to keep doing this program and see where it takes me.  Hello elusive 135 I've always thought was impossible, I'm coming for you!

Relationships:  I had a really rocky time in Puerto Rico.  I honestly love the island.  And oh my, I love the food.  I may not name a kid after pasteles, but I sure as heck would name my first born Mofongo (that stuff is addicting).  I even met a ridiculous amount of interesting people.  However, I was no where near the same path as some of these other people.  Most of the people my age were into never letting the party stop (drunk or high, or both) or they wanted to lounge in front of a fan and a tv. I had just spent the better of the last 2 years of my life, trying to make a healthy and active life; not veg out in front of the tv all the time.  My husband was working almost all the time (about 12 hours a day, 6 days a week) and I felt like I never got to see him.  My dog became my best friend!  I literally had conversations with my dog.  I love that doggie with all my heart (now I have 3).  I'm also pretty sure they were a deterrent for crime. 

The town I lived in was less Americanized than the next town over.  The city is beautiful, but I always drew stares.  I didn't really mind, go ahead and stare, but being followed by people in cars or having people shout: "hey white girl, where you come from?" was a little scary.  Sometimes locals were shocked I'd walk alone anywhere.  That didn't make me feel too safe.  My husband and I are still working on some of the issues that came up from me practically turning into a version of "The Bell Jar." There were days, if our oven had had a gas hook up, my head probably would have been in there.  There were far too many endless days of sitting around in the house alone.  I know, I know.  You are probably thinking: "why didn't you get up and go somewhere or do something?"  I almost never had a car to go anywhere, money was tight, and I had almost no one to do things with me.  I could have gone alone, but there's only so far I can walk alone and my safety was also a concern.  I loved going to the beach, but it took about 45 minutes to walk there.  And again, not so fun when you are there all alone.   If I did find someone to hang out with, it was going out to eat and then watching a movie or movies.  My husband was also exhausted from working long days, so vegging out on his day off was his ideal.  Other times, I'd ask people to hang out and they'd never respond back.  I felt trapped and alone.  I was just plain miserable. So not only am I working on building up my relationship with others, I'm working on building up a loving relationship with myself.

Another relationship that has picked back up is my relationship with God.  I went through a very dark time, multiple times.  I keep trying to give over my doubts and worries to God.  I know that He is bigger and that He has a plan for my husband and I.  He's got plans better than I could ever dream up. I'm so grateful to have a Savior that loves me through thick and thin; even when I don't love myself.  And He wraps me up in His arms of Grace and leads me down the path of life.  He's always beside me.

Career:  There is one word that describes this area of my life perfectly and that would be: POTENTIAL.  I've started the amazing journey of being a LifeStyle and Wellness Coach with Beachbody.  I'm so excited to help others realize their fitness goals and achieve a healthy body that will take them through many years of loving and living life to the fullest. I've also been told some of my "art" would look great on fabrics or as a print.  I'm flabbergasted because I wouldn't ever really consider myself an artist. I'm also looking into potential in other areas.  I also applied for a job in a library.  I am hoping that I get called in to do an interview soon!

So while there is lots of work to still be put into all of these areas of my life, I see nothing but potential in my future!  And if you want any help or accountability in changing your life in these areas, let me know!  I'd love to help you along your journey.  We're all in this together.