Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Roamin' in the Gloamin'

Ok, so it's a little past gloamin' into the full night, but it sounds so pretty! And tonight, my blog is going to be all over the place. As I FLOSS and brush my teeth and take my 50,000mg Vitamin D pill - I am tired. I am tired of being the chubby one, the homely one, the unhealthy one, the one with no clue what to do in life. OMG! I'm so tired of having to fight. I always admired Jo in Little Women, but I am so much more the Beth character. I don't like fighting, bragging, going out, missing the precious moments in my family's life - it's too bad that it isn't practical anymore to be the kid that stays at home because she doesn't get married. I could be an Emily Dickinson that stays up in her room experiencing things with her imagination - a bee, a field, a prairie is mine. I like being quiet, thinking, imagining, dreaming up new things - too bad that doesn't really work unless you are rich!

Another thing on my mental list - Criminal Minds...I love you, but really, only one token "fat" person?!? I love Garcia so much - she's so snappy and fierce, but everyone from the killers, to the victims, to the victims families, to the cops, to the witnesses, to the team...all of them are shapely models. Do chubby, homely/ugly girls never get murdered, raped, kidnapped? Do chubby, homely/ugly guys never get targeted...let alone does this demographic not commit crimes? Where are all the chubby cops - I can tell you that I don't think a single one in my town has anything close to an ab, let alone being 6-pack ripped. Does the average 5'5" size 14 woman never get targeted? Are killers that picky that they only stick with an ideal body size, shape, and looks? Damn, I guess I can't get a date and I can't get murdered either. Well, guess that shirt is right: "Fat girls are hard to kidnap".





Last, but not least, is my first husband/lover/dream beau - Prince William - is getting married this Friday. You can't flip through the channels without seeing some sort of coverage about the wedding. Today's big news was a royal servant carrying a long garment bag - was it the dress or was it a diversion! I thought the coverage on the hats being made for the royal wedding was super cool! I love hats - I esp. love the little hat that I tried on in the Marks and Spencers on the Island of Mann. Such an awesome Spring Break with my travel buddy and roomie. I'll cover more of this later, but I must talk about how Prince William has added to some of my delusions. So when I was about 13 or 14 I had a dream about Prince William. We met next to this HUGE fountain on a night with a gorgeous full moon! And - he gave me my first kiss! I have been deluded with having my first kiss on a full moon, next to a fountain, by my Prince Charming since then. I was quite crest fallen when the night came and past with no kiss...It was Paris, my Prince Charming (Marcus Mumford) had just given a concert I had attended in a park with a ginormous fountain...and it was a full moon. It was the most perfect of perfect settings - well, he walked past me earlier in the night. I might have said hi, but he was talking to some older people (I later found out these were his parents) and I didn't want to interrupt a conversation with the words "incredible guilt" mentioned. I'm glad I didn't interrupt him then, I'm sure he doesn't get to see his parents all that much and I'm pretty positive he wouldn't have wanted a Midwestern girl geeking out on him during his precious time with his family. Oh well - I guess I will just have to wait - or maybe write that scene into a book or movie so I can live vicariously through it!


Well, off to bed! Maybe I can dream up the man that will go roamin' in the gloamin' with me...

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